Working Half-Awake

The last 24-36 hours have been a little interesting. Reminding me again that everything is different, but nothing has changed. Getting back into the flow of working despite being tripped a little was a little difficult but there are still railings that I can sieze should gravity or parasitic growth. I've managed to keep my eyes around me on the vast tapestries around me in order to remind me and remember how to move and flow.

Somehow Past Sam always knows what to say. If only someday Future Sam could drop a line.

10/20/2010

BUUURrrr.
: )

-pics and wandering to be added later

How to Measure Time

I have finally gotten around to getting "The Little Prince" into my possession again. After reading other Dr. Seues books and eating a few grapes I was very glad to sit and remember. I'll have to go back and read "The Rainbow Scale" as I remember my guidance counselor reading it to me in kindergarten. I have also managed to get back into the habit of carrying around a camera around more often. The landscape has yet to be exactly picturable.
I think this semester I feel slippery. A few things grab me as I chance by, but by and large there is just too much oil and they don't stick, or don't find just the right hand hold. Perhaps it is my own hands that are too slick, or that I don't know what holds I can use. The thought is maybe even so maleable, so... not concrete that maybe without definition it simply lacks to be.

There is exactly enough time.

Sitting in an unkept lawn, feeling the long blades of grass, like hair wrapped along my fingers.
Softening my core.
Rays of life scream down from their lonely adventure, warming my skin.
Breathe in infinity and exhale uncertainty.
geometry and colors, rivers and trees.
A single droplet perfectly suspended in slow free fall.
No action without reaction, no movement without cause.
Radiating power. Secure. Warm. Tender. Safe.
Cloud whisping along, who are you really?

Color of a Rhythm

Inspiration

A Controlled Spiral

Past week or so has been of particular interest. I am still suspicious of a particular weed that may still exist, but so far it has been either lurking, or has maybe finally be uprooted. I believe I have finally started getting into a good rythym of time. Always room for improvement, but at least I am doing more of the things that I want to do, and when to do them. Cycles have been hard to tie in at the moment. I feel as if they are there, but the colors don't quite match up. I feel aloof. Despite progress in activities, I can't really tell how passionately I pursuing things at the moment, or if I am merely doing things I think I should and going through them mechanically.
Portland was very useful. It helped remind and push forward life. At the very least, trails in the dark are being illuminated, and with any luck, there may be some more steady light.

Rainy June

What I missed out on this year.

Halo, Soccer, Foods, dog-1, Sciencing, phat cat, Outside Sky-1, Monsters, Sky-2, Sky-3, Dog-2, Having good fun

Collaspe the Light into Earth

Song: Collapse the Light into Earth
Artist: Porcupine Tree

Fare Well

I will be leaving soon, and I don't feel that I've apportioned my time on things correctly, as usual. The last few days of school, and continuing into now are still too busy-busy and I haven't actually gotten to things that I would like to do before leaving. I will do the best I can to continue in augmenting my self with learnings that I should know, or revisit. I got The Giver today from the library at long last. I can't wait to read it again. Even when I was little I recognized that this book at huge undertones that I wasn't able to see in entirety. On another note, Ninja Gaiden is amazing.
I got done taking my SAT's, but even there I found a small tidbit. I forget what the problem was asking me to do, or who the quote was by, but I was asked to look at this quote in a reading problem. The direct quote eludes me, but the idea was that in remembering and thinking about remembered information, actually changes the perspective that it was originally viewed in, and thus changes the memory. If this is true, I have significantly altered my past. I suppose I should concentrate on my future though. Junior year is finally over, and only one more year until college. Even typing that feels weird.
I am also taking requests for book lists. I don't think I have read as much as I should have by now. I have started with re-reading A Wrinkle In Time, and The Giver, but I may also read over Ender's Game, and maybe find some new ones.

After today.. I'm off for adventure i guess.

A Better Representation of Absence

Whitman pictures are at the beginning with all the flatness, and starting at the great door is Reed.



















(The nuclear reactor with accessory duckies)




in no particular order.

Recalled to Life

(4/29/08)





Thank You clouds for being so amazing these past few weeks. I have never before seen so many light beams of helpful truth beams shooting down to Earth in a glorious stand against the overcast. People have also helped me remember things that were familiar to me, and I was sure to be ready to acknowledge, and capture these things.I still need to work. And there is so much work to be done.

Where do we go from here?

Our house is getting ripped apart, so for now, this is how the house looks a while ago. now a days there is less ply wood
Mom and Dad brought back some nutella from italy, so i took that same package to alaska when i went, hoping to maybe augment the nutella with a well traveled taste. after several years of aging, i figured it was getting as traveled as it could get, and ate it in a glorious fashion. it seemed.. cultured.
not to mention it expired about two months before this picture.



It has been a while, but the sky is helping. today i played at least an hour and a half combined of piano and guitar, and the sky helped me remember things that once were, but i still don't think i am doing a good job at internalizing.




I find it a little ironic that at the point in my life were i have the most instrumentals and thought provoking feeling music at my disposal, i am not actually thinking very well. i am doing better, must like as if there were a black metal box in the middle of an empty gray room, and along the edges of the box, brilliant colors are seen, and trying to get out, but only manage to escape in small, insignificant whiffs of curling smoke.

I (Heart) Clouds

Underwater

Progression